Not okay...

Time to pull out the paint and paint on a smile and act like everything's okay even though its far from okay.

But I'm not okay, I'm not okay with him going away, not okay with being without him...not okay.  Bug and I will miss him so much, sure, we're used to him going away for 5 to 6 months, but this is a whole year...

All day I've felt sick to my stomach at the thought of Strider leaving tomorrow night.

Everything's not okay, so very not okay.

I went ahead and redid the crystal binding I had made for Strider over fifteen years ago, put fresh locks of our hair in it and wrapped it up with nice soft cow hide. If the first binding lasted for this long this new one should do great.

Tomorrow night is Bug's show where she'll be singing with the All City Chorus.  After that we're going out for dinner then head to the airport over on base.  Strider's flight leaves at 1am on May 1st....my heart hurts.  I hate being away from my love, even if it's just for a few weeks...but this time it's a year and it's killing me.

Bug's playing Little Big Planet with Strider for the last time until he comes home next year...

No....I'm not okay.


< /RANT >